Little Dolly had a mind,
To be quite spiteful and unkind.
She viewed life with a jaundiced eye.
Though no one knew exactly why.
 
While other children billed and cooed,
Young Dolly could be rather rude.
If her merest wish was thwarted,
Her pretty face became distorted.
 
She'd scream and shout out, “I hate you.”
And raise a finger; sometimes two.
Her parents found it hard to cope
with their malignant misanthrope.
 
And so her dad, a clever man,
Devised a cunning little plan.
“We need a holiday,” he said.
“So, let's all go to Beachy Head.”
 
A lovely bungalow was booked.
'T was in a spot not overlooked.
Which stood five hundred feet or so,
Above the jagged rocks below.
 
But in the middle of the night,
Young Dolly got an awful fright
“Oh daddy dear,” she loudly cried,
“A grisly monster lurks outside.”
 
Her dad put on his dressing gown.
Then went to track the monster down.
But in the dark he could not see,
And fell into the boiling sea.
 
An awfully sad thing some might say.
To lose a loved one in that way.
So why is little Dolly's mum,
Not feeling bad or looking glum?
 
'T was Dolly's evil mum you see,
Who'd pushed him in the boiling sea.
She'd planned it to the last detail.
A fool proof plan that could not fail.
 
Now Dolly's mum; that scheming witch,
Will soon be very, very rich.
(She'd paid the premiums on time.
And carried out the perfect crime.)
 
The day arrived for her to go
To London, to collect the dough.
Then feigning hurt and bleary-eyed,
She called her daughter to her side.
 
Young Dolly gave her ma a kiss,
And handed her some sandwiches.
But instead of jam inside,
Each one was laced with cyanide.
                  
The moral for all mothers is:
Be wary of a daughter's kiss.
And never let yourself forget
A daughter's always daddy's pet.